


Ripening

by forthemyoui



Series: "좋지?" "응, 좋아" / Our Hands in Her Pocket [6]
Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-14
Updated: 2018-04-14
Packaged: 2019-04-22 19:48:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14315889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/forthemyoui/pseuds/forthemyoui
Summary: They needed to get closer, Jihyo instructed, Sana complained, Nayeon decided. They ripened outside the sun, in the narrow spaces that they kept now that they lived this way.





	Ripening

**Author's Note:**

> Also known as "how Sana and Nayeon come to be" done over again and again, masticated and then spit out. I don't write many stories, just the same one that seems true over and over again.

Nayeon remembered Sana saying out loud in the middle of dinner that it was difficult to get close to Nayeon, that she was trying but there was a wall. Nayeon had laughed it off and then slapped Jeongyeon on the shoulder, a reluctant participant in Nayeon’s less-than-successful diversion scheme. It was the first time Nayeon had ever been confronted so openly about something like that, even though Jihyo once in awhile commented dryly about ‘Nayeon difficulties’. In the corner of her eye Nayeon had spotted Sana’s amused expression roughly painted over something that looked a bit more like hurt. That was how Nayeon made the decision to do something about their relationship.

So Nayeon was willing to do something about the wall. It wasn’t just a wall between her and Sana, it was the general wall that enclosed Nayeon and stood between Nayeon and almost every person she interacted with on a daily basis. There was that superficial engagement, and then sometimes Nayeon’s eyes would blank out and she would just care a whit too little and any person who was reasonably observant could see where the fabric didn’t hold up. And then they would feel oddly lonely holding onto her arm on a crowded street. Nayeon sometimes saw when they saw, but she’d never had to acknowledge it because nobody ever said anything. Once in a while Jihyo scolded her, but she could brush that off easily. Sana was a problem because she didn’t know what boundaries were, didn’t swallow hurt in the same way that others did, didn’t get tongue-tied as easily, was persistent, and most of all, seemed to deem her hurt worthy of Nayeon’s attention. That made her difficult. But it also made her deserving.

They were on Garosu-gil, both wearing caps. As per usual Nayeon hadn’t combed her hair. She wore a black sweatshirt and training pants. Sana was on her phone, looking a lot better in a yellow dress and shirt. Her hair was uncombed but she looked somehow lovable like that. She had her glasses on and was looking at her phone as they rounded a street corner. Nayeon noticed she was beginning to look out for people much more now that she was in a group. Sana was just a year younger, but damn was she a bit of an idiot sometimes. Nayeon grabbed Sana’s hand and tugged her closer as a motorcycle moved past.

“You go to this cafe a lot?” Sana asked. “It seems like they know you well.”

“Yeah,” Nayeon replied, “I don’t have to give my autograph every time I visit and they don’t really bother me.”

“What are these coffee names?” Sana asked, running her fingertip down the single menu that they had.

Nayeon tried to explain the names with the menu upside down, but she didn’t know them all and ended up saying absolute nonsense and getting teased by Sana because of that. She just smiled and slapped at Sana’s hand before turning the menu around and ordering for both of them.

“What was that you ordered?” Sana asked.

“It’s not too bitter, don’t worry,” Nayeon said.

“What is it?”

“Don’t be impatient!” Nayeon said and took off her cap; she watched Sana’s reaction to see if the result was good or bad, and then moved to put the cap back on.

Sana stopped her and took the cap off her head, smoothing out her hair.

“You know I only like sweet stuff,” Sana said as she did Nayeon’s hair.

“It’s not bad, I promise,” Nayeon said.

“It’s okay,” Sana said calmly, “I’ll still drink it. I want to know what you like.”

Nayeon looked down at the menu items that she had chosen and her thumb covered the familiar stain on the corner of the menu. This place had exactly two menus because it was small, so the menus changed hands frequently and they retained the same distinguishing features. Nayeon pursed her lips; it was true that she wanted to share this place with someone and have someone like what she liked, or at least understood what she liked.

“Be honest,” Nayeon said when the coffee came.

Sana coughed and almost giggled. “It’s nice.”

“Oh, that’s mine,” Nayeon said, laughing at herself. “Give it here.”

Sana made a motion to clean the rim of the cup, which wasn’t something they did on a regular basis, but perhaps it seemed like Nayeon’s coffee was a special private sort of thing and they weren’t going to share, since they had separate orders. Nayeon pushed the offered piece of tissue away.

“Try yours,” Nayeon encouraged, and took a sip of her own coffee, all the while watching Sana.

“Mm!” Sana made a high-pitched noise. “It’s milky.”

Nayeon laughed, elbows on the table and head hunched between her shoulders. “That’s it?”

“Mm!” Sana repeated. “It’s not bitter. Why?”

Nayeon shrugged. “They have artisanal explanations and all that. It’s like, made with ripe beans.”

“Why aren’t all the beans ripe?”

“It’s kind of hard to tell when they are,” Nayeon tried explaining what she had read on a Wikipedia page, “and if they aren’t, they taste worse, and they can jam grinding machines and ruin good beans. These are like… hand-harvested.”

“Are you just talking about more stuff you haven’t tried?” Sana teased her. “You’re good at reading.”

Nayeon snorted, embarrassed. “Yes, maybe.”

Sana enjoyed her coffee and looked at it every now and again, blowing on it. For a while she blew on the coffee and Nayeon realised she was changing the swirls on the surface of the coffee. She tried to run her fingers through her hair and work out the dry bits and knots. Bringing Sana to this cafe was like bringing a lover to meet the parents, was like undressing in front of someone for the first time, but Jihyo had demanded that Nayeon really ‘try’, so this had to be it. Nayeon didn’t feel too exposed or uncomfortable. She was already slipping into her usual demeanour at the cafe, relaxed and careless and almost expressionless.

“So I was thinking,” Nayeon said, “about getting some stuff for making drip coffee.”

“Drip?”

“Drip coffee.”

Sana made a gesture at her wrist. “Drip?”

“No, it’s like a method of making coffee, you idiot,” Nayeon laughed shortly. “I want to get some equipment for it. And order beans. It’s a little expensive.”

“How much?”

“Like, a few hundred thousand won. In the upper hundreds.”

Sana nodded. “I mean, if you’re going to use it. And if you’re going to get some equipment, you might as well get the good sort.”

“Yeah. I can probably like make some in the mornings.”

“Would you really.”

Nayeon frowned. “I can wake up early.”

“Fine, make me some.”

“It’ll be bitter,” Nayeon promised. “You’ll have to add milk and all that, but I’m not sure it’ll be nice like that.”

Sana shrugged. “I can just pretend I like it like once and never drink it again.”

“I’ll probably buy things and then let them rot again,” Nayeon interrupted with the thought that came up most on this issue. “Too busy to make full use of it.”

“We’re too busy to make full use of anything. Doesn’t mean you shouldn’t buy something you want.”

Nayeon nodded slowly, looking at her hands and pursing her lips. “Yup.”

After they had sat a while, Nayeon just drinking coffee and zoning out and Sana doing whatever she was doing on her phone, Nayeon gathered their shopping bags, because they were prone to forgetting them, and got up to pay. Before she turned to go to the cashier Nayeon put on her cap and drank the last bit of coffee in her cup. She leaned down and kissed Sana on the cheek and then turned away to pay.

Nayeon could feel Sana staring after her. She made payment quietly, and then they exited the cafe.

For some reason Nayeon was convinced Sana wouldn’t say anything after that. Nayeon had always been used to people becoming stunned silent by her interest, lack of interest, and general actions. Nayeon was an independent force that did things as it liked and people were just objects moved by that force. But Sana took Nayeon’s hand first as they walked along the street. Nayeon didn’t address it.

“I’m embarrassed,” Sana said.

“Why?” Nayeon asked, amused.

“You kissed me.”

“Uh huh,” Nayeon replied.

“Aren’t you going to take responsibility for it?” Sana asked, giggling.

“Car.”

They stopped at the junction as a car eked past people having their strolls.

“I feel like you opened up to me today,” Sana stated.

Nayeon only nodded, completely at a loss for words.

“I liked it,” Sana said, smiling brightly.

“Oh, it was tiring,” Nayeon finally said jokingly, “putting in the effort.”

“Shall I also give you a kiss?”

“Don’t want it,” Nayeon said and started walking again.

Sana skipped to catch up to her, almost dropping a bag. “I’m expensive, you know!”

Nayeon laughed. “You can save it.”

Sana took out her phone and they followed a map to get to where they had first been dropped off; their manager must be sleeping in the car by now. Nayeon swung Sana’s hand in hers as they walked. It was beginning to feel like a walk too short even though this afternoon excursion had been a pretty long one; if they stayed just a bit longer the sun would set between narrowly set buildings. Nayeon feared dropping her facade at some point, but there wasn’t anything that could undo this unspecial, simple comfort. It was as if this was how it had always been, as if they could be quiet for ages and no one would suddenly have an unvoiced sore in their chest from hurt and isolation. They were joined by the hands.

They could see their vehicle at the end of the street.

“To be honest,” Nayeon said, Sana responding with her usual ‘hmm?’, “I think I malfunctioned and stopped at your cheek.”

Sana gasped out loud, but regained her composure immediately after that, becoming the thoughtful person most knew her to be after spending enough time with her. “No, it’s because we’re not ready.”

Nayeon looked ahead with her tongue knotted in her mouth. ‘Not ready’ implied a timeline and an end of ‘readiness’. Nayeon didn’t know how Sana was catching onto her whirlwind feelings so quickly. It was as if Sana was born to recognise sudden winds for what they were and move with them. None of the surprise she must have had was reflected on her face.

Two weeks later when Sana surreptitiously removed a package from the pile in their living room and stole it away into some other room, Nayeon knew what she was doing. In the evening when they returned from their schedule Nayeon found the filters and set of tools on her bed and Sana watching from outside the room.

“Come here,” Nayeon said, beckoning Sana when Sana only moved slowly in response. “We might be ready now.”

**Author's Note:**

> I don't have notes I just create end notes so that I can access the bottom of the page faster.


End file.
